Philosophy from "Hitch"

So I was watching the movie "Hitch" this afternoon.

If you haven't seen the movie before, Will Smith plays a character named Alex Hitchens, nicknamed "Hitch." This is both a connection to his last name as well as a connection to what he does for a living. Hitch works as a personal consultant whose goal is to help men have success in building a relationship with a woman they've interested in.

Anyway...I really appreciated the movie because I feel like it brought up an important point about the way we related to each other:

• Women are SO careful about being open with men, particularly those they don't know well. Primarily because there are scumbag men out there who will take advantage of vulnerability in an effort to "get some" and then move on to the next conquest.
• Men who AREN'T scumbags forever have to play the guessing game to figure out what women really want because they're not open about how they really feel. Of course, this leads to a lack of confidence in the non-scumbag men in many cases.

And what has happened as a result of all of this? Focusing on superficiality, because we end up playing all these stupid games. The sad part is that none of it is malicious for the large majority of people. We're just trying to avoid getting hurt. Nobody likes being hurt.

Thing is...this is probably the reason behind most of the divorces that occur and most of the broken relationships. In our quest to avoid emotional pain, we fail to be completely open and honest. As a result, we CAUSE emotional pain to ourselves AND those we believe we care about.

Imagine how much easier life would be if we were all honest in a positive way. I don't mean walking up to a colleague and saying, "Why are you wearing that hideous shirt?" But what's worse is NOT saying that, but then gossiping about that same shirt to other people behind that person's back. And what's the point of that anyway? I mean, if you don't have something constructive to say (mind you, constructive doesn't always mean being complimentary), then don't say anything at all. If you're not willing to spend the time and effort to help that fashion-deprived colleague, then don't say anything at all. To ANYONE.

Now, I won't sit here and pretend that I don't fail in this regard myself. Trust me...I fall short on a daily basis. But I genuinely believe this: honesty truly is the best policy. If you combine honesty with the Golden Rule (and let's face it: who other than the exceedingly selfish doesn't believe in that particular maxim?), then it works.

In the end, to be happy? Be honest. Be yourself.